Start joke websitepráce

I am aiming to have a pi zero programmed to read voltage levels from a 12-volt battery bank. The trigger to start the generator should be a low voltage condition. The purpose of this project is to remotely start the generator, with a focus on maintaining efficiency and practicality through a direct physical connection. Key objectives include: - Programming the pi zero to accurately gauge low voltage conditions - Enabling the generator to automatically power up in case of a drop in voltage. - Continuing the generator input even after the voltage returns to normal, with this feature designed to maintain a steady and reliable power supply. Ideal Freelancer Skills: - In-depth understanding of Raspberry Pi Zero programming for hardware operations - Knowledge in direct physica...

I am looking for a skilled marketing manager who can spearhead the development, planning, and execution of our marketing strategy for our SaaS company, UltraDisplayAds. The goal is to acquire 1000+ customers within the first 6 months. Key Responsibilities: - Develop a comprehensive marketing strategy that targets small businesses, medium-sized businesses, and large enterprises - Plan and execute marketing campaigns to drive customer acquisition - Monitor and track the effectiveness of the strategy and campaigns to optimize results Requirements: - Proven experience in SaaS and/or tech industry marketing - Ability to create and implement strategies that will help us grow from zero to 1000+ customers within 6 months - Proficiency in various marketing channels such as email marketing, socia...

...illustrations or audio. - not IA generated - not from internet or from existing books (sorry, we already have them all) Ideal candidates for this project are: - Experienced writers or joke creators who understand the unique sense of humor of middle schoolers. - Able to produce engaging and fun content that is suitable for kids/family party. - Creative and able to come up with a wide range of jokes on different everyday topics. Your work will help entertain and engage our young listeners and must respect the target audience's age and sensibilities. We can discuss for a prize for ---10 quality joke---. Each joke must be well researched, original and provoke laughter from young and old alike. We don't want jokes that chatgpt can do. ====================...

I am initiating a new enterprise and I need a proficient mobile app developer who can create a user-friendly e-commerce application for both Android and iOS platforms. Key Responsibilities: - Develop a robust e-commerce application for Android and iOS - Ensure the app supports transactions for both selling products and services Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficient in Android and iOS development - Proven experience in creating commercial-grade apps - Experience in e-commerce apps is a significant plus - Familiarity with secure, efficient transaction methods - Excellent problem-solving skills and attention to details.

I am in need of a skilled iOS app designer to help develop a start-up program aimed at addressing the ubiquitous problem of lost phones. Key Duties: - Conceptualize, design, and implement app features and functionality Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficient in iOS platform app design - Prior experience in start-up or related app development - Solid understanding of user experience and interface design - Excellent problem-solving skills and creativity - Ability to work within deadlines and multi-task effectively. This project requires someone who can intuitively understand the needs of a start-up and bring creative solutions to the table. I look forward to hearing from you. I have searched the app store and have not found anything like this but it is very ...

I'm looking for a talented fashion designer to help me bring my ideas to life. The specific details of the project are: - Looking for someone who is based in Bengaluru, India - I'm primarily...market and be able to create unique, stylish, appealing designs, and showcasing your creative side. - You'll be designing full sets of clothing, including tops, bottoms, dresses, co-ords, men shirts, etc. - Immediate start. The perfect candidate for this job would have a keen eye for style and a strong understanding of the adult casual clothing market. It's also crucial that you can work with me to incorporate my vision into the final designs. Experience in similar projects or a strong portfolio of adult casual wear designs would be highly advantageous and also willing ...

I'm in need of a creative and skilled writer to craft comedy skits for my TikTok channel. The highly engaging content should target an adult audience. Key Requirements: - Skilled in writing comedy scripts - Able to deliver in a storyboard format - Understanding of TikTok trends and audience preferences - Strong storytelling and joke-writing abilities The ideal freelancer should have a keen sense of humor, an understanding of the TikTok platform and be able to produce content that resonates specifically with an adult audience. I'm looking for skits that are funny, relatable and highly shareable.

Please submit a voice recording using to apply to this job, you must submit a voice recording telling about your experience & schedule (must speak Spanish & English) If you do not submit a recording, we will not contact you. The pay is $100 / week, starting.

I have two photos where I need the same location, same spot to have the addition of both large and spiderweb cracks. These should be a combination of subtle and prominent cracks, to create a realistic effect. Ideal skills and experience for this job include: - Proficiency in photo editing and manip...photo editing and manipulation software such as Adobe Photoshop or GIMP - Previous experience with creating realistic effects, such as scratches or cracks - A good eye for detail to ensure the cracks blend well with the original photos - Ability to understand and meet the client's need for a combination of subtle and prominent effects - Understanding the client's need for the photos to be used as a joke on a friend, and being able to ensure the cracks are realistic enough to...

Rebuilding a fullscreen section in Elementor on your server Content Homepage / Fullscreen Section: Animated font Animated flipping image menu Please only report freelancers who can realize this today. It is not a very big task Thank you

I need someone to manage my social networks and help me transform sales. I want to create a website and drive traffic to my page.

**NO OR LIMITED EXPERIENCE IS OK - FEEL FREE TO APPLY. DO NOT USE GENERIC BID TEXT (NO COPY PASTING)*** Role is perfect for motivated and learning individuals who are eager for feedback and want to grow skills. Duration is 30 days internship. Those who surpass expectations will receive a serious offer to stay on team with better compensation. Sample tasks and responsibilities include, and are NOT limited to: 1. Research key topics or areas of interest and presenting options for the next steps. -> googling 2. Executing next steps and promptly executing action items from discussions. -> take instructions and act fast 3. Propose options from research as requested -> more googling 4. Be able to advise proactively on details including step by step documents where needed -> ...

We are looking to hire some drivers to help with errands done for some of the known wealthiest high-end individuals and families around our area. We also get occasional out of town well known celebrity visitors. What kind of people who don't want to be in public doing these kinds of tasks, or they just stay too busy to do them on their own. Aaron's like picking up their groceries or any sort of supplies that they may need for their household, or anything else that they think they may need. Sometimes they may even need help bringing an elderly relative or a child to some sort of appointment or a class. We have been operating around the area and the state and surrounding areas since the 90s. We know how to be discreet and get every client from another client's referral. We do ...

I need a freelancer to make a number of website amendments as highlighted by an SEM Rush report. Please see summary attached. Budget for this project is $50USD but this will lead to more work. Bids greater than $50USD will be deleted. IMMEDIATE START REQUIRED.

...together: Michael would teach Jennifer how to make the lamp, letting her feel the joy of creation; and Jennifer would tell Michael her stories and dreams, letting him know more about her inner world. Their relationship grows deeper and deeper, as if they have become an integral part of each other's lives. But the hands of fate seem to veer off course at their happiest moment and play an irreversible joke on the two lovers when Michael dies unexpectedly, leaving Jennifer to face the darkness alone. However, whenever night falls, there is always a lamp in Jennifer's room that lights up silently. That lamp, once handmade by Michael, had a soft and warm light, just like the romance Michael brought to her. It was as if she could see Michael standing underneath the lamp, smi...

I'm initiating a new enterprise and need an expert who can create an eye-catching logo and establish a strong brand identity for my business. Key Requirements: - Proficient in logo and graphic design - Strong understanding of color theory, particularly with Bright Pink, White, and Black - Able to deliver a strong brand identity that aligns with business Timeline: The project timeline is within a month. Ideal candidate: - Experienced in working with startups - Has a portfolio showcasing versatile and high-quality logo designs - Quick to understand business necessities - Good communication skills - Meets deadlines efficiently - Able to handle revisions if necessary for the satisfaction of the project. Looking forward to transforming my vision into a real brand identity.

I'm an intermediate WordPress user and I'm looking to learn how to set up a comprehensive RSS Gallery Slideshow Article for Microsoft Start. I would appreciate a step-by-step guide or tutorial on how to achieve this.

I'm in need of a concise business plan to present to a lending bank in order to secure a start-up loan. The plan should be less than 10 pages and tailored to the needs and expectations of financial institutions. Key Points: - The purpose of this business plan is particularly to secure funding. - Our primary audience is the lending bank, so the plan should be structured and articulated to meet the expectations of this type of financial institution. - The plan should be less than 10 pages, focusing on key information and financial projections that will be crucial for the bank's decision-making process. Ideal Freelancer: - Someone with previous experience in creating business plans for securing bank loans. - Strong financial background and understanding of what financial in...

The application in the Link below is to help sales people at car dealerships connect inventory with Facebook Marketplace. The app posts, deletes, and updates pricing on the users personal profile / marketplace account. I want to redesign this making it very flexible to give users a clear understanding and options to manage the listings on marketplace. Here is the current application. I will not HIRE or PAY anyone, until you have proven you can produce a quality result. You can think of this as an interview, to showcase your work. We already have this app running and working with customers. This is simply a redesign. Here is a link to the Desktop App:

1 API fixing issue. 2 button issues. Able to work with ftp and start immediately

... **solid wood, metal, upholstered, functionality furniture, mattresses, and many more (everything furniture related). Our initial budget to get this venture off the ground is very limited, the right Consultant/COO will need to be creative in strategizing on how we can minimize our start-up investment cost, which can potentially be achieved by; (1) starting off with a very small scale operation, possibly a well developed workshop with minimal equipment and a handful of skilled workers. This allows us to start-off with minimal manufacturing, concentrating on our immediate production needs, while simultaneously focusing on the development and growth of the business. (2) instead of investing a substantial amount of capital in the beginning on equipment cost, it may be more f...

I'm in need of a sound engineer to assist with recording sound that is difficult to capture, involving multidirectional sound waves and sound streams, some of them barely audible to the human...Excellent with sound wave manipulation - Comfortable amplifying faint sound Please note, the project has no strict deadline. You're welcome to give this project the time and attention it requires, as determining the sound source, recording and amplifying it may take time. There is a super long background to this task, with a website and links reagarding the sound we will be looking to capture (about as faint as the flapping of a fly's wings, the flick of a mouse's tail - no I joke but it can be faint) and I will provide that to interested candidates to understand ...

I need a skilled website designer to create an informative and sleek site for my newly founded company. The website will comprise of 2-3 pages and be a rich balance of text and images. While client-side scripting is acceptable, please note that server-side code is not allowed, particularly PHP. Key elements of the design to consider are: - Modern and sleek aesthetic - Accommodate clear and structured text - Feature high-quality, relevant images - Design a simple Logo Striking design that is easy to navigate should be a key aim for this concept. The ideal candidate has experience with modern design principles and understands how to use images and text in a visually appealing way to inform site visitors. delivery should include full source as a ZIP file

...com/sensity-ai/dot As explained in the tutorial I like the idea of being able to press 1 to be Biden, 2 Trump, 3 Arnold Schwarzenegger, and so on. I would like to be able to talk and change my facial expressions etc and I want the video experience to be smooth and life-like. I would need it delivered within a week. I don't mind paying a fair wage for this but I want us to be reasonable. I am doing this as a joke and then maybe my kids will get some fun with it. I am flexible but was hoping to get this completed for $250.00 or so. I am much more comfortable with Windows but if it simply won't work with Windows I am ok with Linux. I also heard a rumor that people are able to do something similar to this using TikTok and OBS but I could be totally off on that. Tha...

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I'm looking for an experienced videographer to create a documentary-style video that chronicles the journey of my startup for my business launch event in Jamaica. Key Focus of the video: * The video should highlight the hard work, dedication and resilience that I and my team have put into building my startup. * It should be a looping video that will play during my speech at the event. Content for the video: * I will provide pictures from past events, recorded meetings and pitches, personal or professional video clips. These should be included in the video to enrich the storytelling. Ideal skills: * Previous experience in documentary-style video creation is preferred. * Understanding of the startup landscape may be beneficial. * Ability to weave a compelling narrative using the ...

I am seeking a partner who can guide me through the fundraising process for my travel technology startup, based in India. Our company aims to provide comprehensive technological resources to travel agents, including: - Booking management system - Client management system - Hotel booking capabilities - Real-time updates for all necessary information We aspire to create a platform that offers a simplified management system, ensuring a hassle-free experience for travel agents and the Traveller. I need someone who has experience in securing investments for similar projects. An in-depth understanding of the tech startup environment in India and solid connections with potential investors would be highly advantageous. The ideal fit would be someone who not only can help in raising funds but al...

I'm a start-up looking for a graphic designer to join on a month-by-month basis. The first month's salary is Rs15000, but if things go well, you can expect good earnings from the second month onwards. Key Design Tasks: - Social Media Graphics: I need assistance with creating engaging social media graphics. This includes: - Infographic Design: You should be able to create eye-catching infographics that convey information in a visually appealing way. - Banner Designs: I also require banners for various social media platforms that represent the brand and attract the target audience. Website Design Goals: - Increase Brand Awareness: The website should help in making the brand more visible and recognizable. - Drive Online Sales: Additionally, the website...

I am in need of a virtual assistant who can efficiently handle my Instagram & FB business account. It involves the following: - Fast SEO for startup and ranking them - Proactively DMing and reaching out to my target audience with the goal to enhance leads and ultimately convert them to sales. Initial target 100 DM’s per day - Responding to messages in a prompt and friendly manner. - Managing and moderating comments to ensure a positive experience for my followers. This is a part-time role requiring 1-2 hours of your dedicated service every day. You need to have excellent interpersonal skills and a knack for sales talk. Preferably, you have experience with Instagram's and Facebook business interface and are familiar with its demographics. I look forward to your bid.

I am in need of an experienced SEO expert to help boost my cookery Youtube channel's visibility and subscriber count. Key Requirements: - Proven experience in successfully increasing views and subscribers on Youtube channels - Deep understanding of Youtube SEO strategies and algorithms Responsibilities: - Conduct a thorough audit of my Youtube channel and suggest improvements to enhance visibility - Implement effective SEO strategies to increase views and subscribers - Monitor the performance of the channel regularly and provide recommendations for further optimizations - Stay updated with the latest Youtube SEO trends and algorithms Ideal Candidate: - Strong background in SEO, specifically on Youtube - Excellent knowledge of cookery/food content and audience engagement - Great co...

We're a dynamic cryptocurrency start-up on a mission to refresh our brand identity. We need a skilled freelance logo designer with: We're seeking a logo designer who possesses: Proven Expertise: Demonstrated experience in crafting modern and impactful logos. Industry Experience: Previous work with tech or fintech brands, particularly in the cryptocurrency sector. Market Understanding: A deep understanding of the cryptocurrency market and its symbolism, enabling the creation of logos that capture our essence. Project Details: Color Palette: Our preferred color for the new logo is blue, reflecting trust, stability, and innovation. Style: We envision a modern aesthetic for our logo, avoiding overly abstract or minimalist designs. Design Elements: The logo should incorpora...

python chrom headless script which will visit given list of URLs/websites aftear each config delay in seconds. script will use different ip in each iteration of list urls visit. it will keep running untill ip list end and start from 1 again. You will suggest from where i will buy rotating ip proxies which not blocked by the urls. Purpose of this script. visit given list of urls with different ip proxies. rotating ip proxies will be fine these are example urls: one is this link :

python chrom headless script which will visit given list of URLs/websites aftear each config delay in seconds. script will use different ip in each iteration of list urls visit. it will keep running untill ip list end and start from 1 again. You will suggest from where i will buy rotating ip proxies which not blocked by the urls. Purpose of this script. visit given list of urls with different ip proxies. rotating ip proxies will be fine these are example urls: one is this link :

Need to recount the stock quantity based on approve order (Write script to run it) Loop all the orders one time to get latest remaining value. Able to work with ftp. Laravel work. (Not amend source code, or bugs) Start immediately.

Need to recount the stock quantity based on approve order (Write script to run it) Able to work with ftp. Laravel work. Start immediately.

I will be choosing someone one hour from now. Answer me this questions: Are you available immediately? We have a demo tomorrow 9am EST What is your experience with PHP? What AI tools do you use to make your devleopment faster? Are you comfortable working hourly?

I will be choosing someone one hour from now. Answer me this questions: Are you available immediately? What is your experience with react native? What AI tools do you use to make your devleopment faster? Are you comfortable working hourly?

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READ FIRST: ONLY HOURLY CONTRACTS, no fixed rate because I have multiple bug fixes on trello and I need someone to start immedaitely. We have demo tomorrow. I want someone to work the next 8-10 hours on time tracker (no manual hours). Important, I need someone immediately

Looking for php/mysql developer to integrate discount coupon backend into admin panel. Straight forward. The admin panel is already working with a mobile app. We need to add that functionalitiy so we can later integrate it on mobile app

Looking for react native/php developer to take a list of bugfixes. We need someone to start now and work on EST timezone

See "pair programming/code walk-through" for details. This is just a 3h milestone to see, if it makes sense to collaborate.

I'm starting a new eCommerce store and need a vibrant, fun, Stylish but playful logo that embodies the spirit of my brand. The design should be modern, yet approachable and fresh, and it should be colourful to catch the eye of potential customers. Key Requirements: - A logo design that's fun, playful and modern - Bright, colourful or striking palette - Reflective of an eCommerce store's ethos but can also be used for a high street shop front sign. - Suitable for use on social media profiles - The name is 'Clumzy' so I would like the Z to stand out in a subtle but noticeable way. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proven experience in designing logos for eCommerce businesses - Proficiency in creating modern and fun designs - A portfolio that showcases your ability to...

I'm seeking a creative designer to craft a logo for our Leon County Democratic Party event, which is themed "Keep Leon Blue". The logo should incorporate a harmonious blend of blue color themes and Leon County landmarks. A playful element to include in the design is an inside joke about a guy jumping over a fence. Ideal candidates will have experience in graphic design specifically for event promotions and T-shirt printing, comprehending visual symbolism and humor. Deep knowledge in color theory and proportions will be advantageous. The chosen design will be used primarily for event promotion and T-shirt prints.

I'm looking for a skilled photo editor to create a series of images as part of a fun joke for my sister and her fiancée. They're big Disney fans, so I'd like you to edit a photo of them to make it look like they got married at Disney World/Land. **Main Task:** - Edit the main photo to realistically place them at a Disney theme park. **Secondary Task:** - Create about 6 Disney-themed images, using their likenesses. These images will be edited into Disney posters. - The first image should be expertly edited, while the rest can be more basic. **Specifics:** - I have pictures of them, but you're free to choose the most fitting ones. - The first image requires a high level of editing skills, while the remaining ones can be more basic. - I'd like them t...

We are looking for a skilled Graphics Designer for our start-up street-wear clothing brand. You will be expected to create quality designs in the style of casual street-wear. The products include sweatshirts, t-shirts etc. You will need to create mock-ups/tech packs ready to send to the manufacturer. These are some references, and there are some references attached to this post as well. As we are a startup brad in our very initial stages, our budget is especially tight. Therefore, kindly contact us only if you are comfortable with working on a low budget per design (30-50 dollars per design, but it would be greatly appreciated if you can work within 30-40 dollars). Of course, we see a lot of potential in our brand and with

cancel this pls it was a joke :(

Collect 1000 start up company based on USA and Canada including company name, website, twitter , LinkedIn and founder name and LinkedIn(if available). There is no specific employee size. But all company-established date should be from 2023 to present.

Im looking for a react native/php developer to handle multiple bug fixes. I need someone that can start immediately. I have a list of bugs on trello. Mainly backend issues I need someone that can get into the project and start now